Menopause on Your Terms: How to Take Back Control of Your Body and Feel Like Yourself Again
For many women, the words perimenopause and menopause spark a mix of dread and confusion. Hot flashes, mood swings, weight gain, fatigue…we’ve all heard the horror stories. But here’s the truth: while you can’t stop the biological shift from happening, you have far more control than you think over how you feel during these phases of life.
As a health coach, I’ve learned that understanding why these changes happen is key. With targeted action, women don’t just survive menopause - they thrive. Through balanced meals, smart lifestyle choices, and the right lab work, you can make this transition one of your most empowered chapters yet. Let’s break down what’s happening in your body, what you can control, and how to make this transition in a practical way that suits your lifestyle.
What’s Really Happening During Perimenopause & Menopause?
First let’s make sure we’re on the same page when it comes to what perimenopause and menopause are. Perimenopause is the transitional phase before menopause. It can last anywhere from 2 to 10 years. It begins when your ovaries start producing less estrogen and progesterone. This hormonal decline affects every system in your body: brain, bones, metabolism, cardiovascular health, and even mood regulation. Menopause itself is officially defined as 12 consecutive months without a period. By then, estrogen levels have dropped significantly, and your body has adjusted to a new hormonal baseline.
The symptoms you feel, hot flashes, sleep disruption, brain fog, low libido, anxiety, and stubborn weight gain, aren’t random. They’re biochemical signals that your body is recalibrating. These things may make you feel that you’re not in control of your body, but it can be really helpful to focus on what you can control during these very personal shifts. So let’s take a look at those!
Focusing on What You Can Control
The conversation around menopause often focuses on what’s lost. But I want to focus on what’s possible. While you can’t turn back the hormonal clock - with diet, movement, supplementation where needed, and targeted labwork, you can influence:
The severity of your symptoms
Your energy, mood, and weight
Your risk for long-term health conditions
How you feel each day in your own skin
So the question is, what can you control? Let’s dive in…
Food as a Hormone Ally
Your diet can help you manage symptoms, support hormone balance, and protect long-term health. Here are some food habits to keep in mind when supporting your body through perimenopause and menopause.
1. Prioritize Protein
Hormonal changes can lead to muscle loss and a slower metabolism. Aim for 20–30g of protein per meal to maintain lean muscle and stabilize blood sugar.
2. Color Your Plate with Phytoestrogens
Deeply pigmented fruits and vegetables (berries, leafy greens, bell peppers) help reduce inflammation and support hormone metabolism. Foods like ground flaxseeds, chickpeas, and lentils contain plant compounds that can bind to estrogen receptors, offering gentle hormone support.
3. Balance Blood Sugar
Blood sugar spikes can worsen hot flashes, mood swings, and fatigue. Pair carbs with protein or healthy fat, and choose high-fiber sources like whole grains, vegetables, and berries. Aim for 25-35g of fiber per day.
4. Bring on the Anti-Inflammatory Foods
Omega-3-rich salmon, olive oil, leafy greens, walnuts, and colorful vegetables can reduce inflammation that exacerbates joint pain, brain fog, and fatigue.
5. Reduce Ultra-Processed Foods and Refined Sugar
Ultra-processed food can spike blood sugar, worsen hot flashes, and increase inflammation.
Labs Worth Discussing with Your Provider
You don’t need to test everything at once, but the right labs can uncover underlying drivers of your symptoms. Partner with your healthcare provider to get a clear picture of your hormonal and metabolic health. Knowing your numbers can help you make targeted decisions. Here are some of the most impactful levels to know:
Sex Hormones: Estradiol, Progesterone, Testosterone
Thyroid Panel: TSH, Free T4, Free T3, Reverse T3, Thyroid antibodies
Metabolic Health: Fasting glucose, HbA1c, fasting insulin, cortisol
Nutrient Status: Vitamin D, B6, B12, Ferritin, Magnesium
Inflammation Marker: CRP (C-reactive protein)
With this information, you can get more specific with how you’re supporting your body. One way to add in specific support is through supplementation. You don’t want to go overboard with supplements, but they can be a great way to ensure you’re getting enough of the right nutrients.
Supplements That May Help
Always check with your healthcare provider before starting supplements, especially if you take medications, but these supplements have evidence for menopause symptom support:
Magnesium glycinate: Supports sleep, relaxation, and muscle function
Omega-3 fish oil: Anti-inflammatory, supports heart and brain health
Vitamin D3 + K2: Bone, mood, and immune health
Adaptogens (ashwagandha, rhodiola): Support stress resilience
Black cohosh or red clover: Herbal options for hot flashes in some women
The Hormone–Symptom Connection
When estrogen declines, so does progesterone. This means cortisol (your stress hormone) can easily dominate. Chronically high cortisol increases belly fat, disrupts sleep, and intensifies mood swings. Here’s what can help:
7–9 hours of quality sleep
Strength training: just 3 sessions per week can improve insulin sensitivity, bone density, and muscle tone
Stress-reducing habits: breathwork, walking, meditation
Avoiding overtraining: chronic HIIT can worsen cortisol spikes
The Estrogen–Breast Cancer Link
A common fear is that any estrogen, even in hormone replacement therapy (HRT), automatically raises breast cancer risk. However, the truth is more nuanced. Risk factors depend on:
Type of estrogen used
Whether progesterone is also given (and what kind)
Your personal and family history
Timing (starting HRT closer to menopause may carry different risks than starting later)
Whether you are at high risk for breast cancer or not, you and your doctor can weigh hormonal and non-hormonal strategies, such as lifestyle interventions, targeted supplements, and certain prescription options, to manage symptoms safely.
The Last Bite: Menopause Can Be a Turning Point
Menopause marks the end of your reproductive years, but it can also be the start of your most vibrant years. You can’t control the fact that menopause will happen, but you can control how your body weathers the transition. This transition is not a loss, it’s a recalibration. And it’s your chance to take full ownership of your health. By fueling yourself with the right foods, moving your body, checking the right labs, supplementing wisely, and addressing root causes, you can feel strong, vibrant, sharp, and empowered in this new season of life.
If you’re ready to create a personalized plan for your perimenopause or menopause journey, I’d love to help support you. Together, we’ll cut through the noise and focus on what works — for you.